Monday, September 20, 2010

Residual Effect

They say we can't escape our own evil. The past won't really leave us in peace in the present. It would always stay in the dark corner of the forgetful mind. So forgetful that it had to focus on other priorities in order to stay sane. One simple and quick solution of the troubled mind, so distressful and full of remorse, for having done despicable things to other gentle and lovely human beings, is of course, keeping the mind preoccupied in doing something else. The adrenaline rush would be an instant remedy, besides drugs and stimulants to keep the stress at bay, of course.

Well, most of the time, it worked, being preoccupied that is, sometimes, reality hits us, so hard, right there in the face and we could lose the keenness of dodging them after all the lies that the fat rich manipulators had put us through. It sucks. The feeling of being used and lured to do other's bidding, sacrificing your time, energy and sometimes your own sake for the not so sure bunch of people. Trust me. I know what I'm talking about. Spending not a year, but years of service of a known would be doomed policy or cause. And doing it while losing focus on things that matters most to yourself, sacrificing them so that your 'service' would be highly regarded by those who couldn't care less about you. Surely the side effect would reveal itself little by little, depending how destructive the feeling of despair has on one's soul. Multiply the effect a million times and then maybe you could get some ideas on how  an empty war could do to one's sense of worth. It is still not the same actually. The ones that had killed and maimed their fellow humans, would be forever haunted. Maybe haunted is the right word after all to describe the brave soldiers that have been used and manipulated by the filthy rich, profiteers of pain. They and their progeny are spared. As always.

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